This Business of Starting Over

As I’m putting my days and weeks together, I’m finding that I still greatly overestimate what I’m able to do in a day. Energy is still low, even though my motivation has increased.

iphoneI knew I was being discharged from the outpatient program this week, and so I plugged activities into the week. Vacuuming, grocery shopping, filing.

And, on Tuesday, I joined the gym I’ve been looking at for several months now, making a commitment to myself to exercise 5x a week, at least. That exercise I make my primary activity for the day. All other items are secondary. This balance of energy is what I have been imagining for the last month.

Thinking of the 8 Areas of Wellness, I’m prioritizing physical wellness even though I’m aware of and trying to do something in the other areas each week too. Physical wellness has not been a priority for me in a long time. Now I use the app MyFitnessPal and I’m prioritizing energy toward exercise.

What is happening though, is that I’m not having energy for the other items I’ve put in my calendar. I’m breaking appointments with myself and shoving items off to other days. I know in my head this is a normal thing that most everyone does everyday. I just thought that when I was putting each small task into my calendar, I was being reasonable about what I could do in a day.

I guess I’m still getting used to my energy levels, and learning what “reasonable” means. Balance and Bipolar. A dance that is necessary to learn for longterm stability.

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3 responses to “This Business of Starting Over

  1. It’s such a challenge to find the energy and the balance. For me working out is the most important part of my day, and I make it a priority each and every day. I find it helps my self-confidence and gets me going on all of the other things on my to do list. I hope once you’re in the swing of things it helps you as much as it helps me.

  2. Go easy on yourself. If you don’t have the energy to do all the things on your list – your list might have been too long. Take baby steps and know that in doing so you’re making progress to a LASTING solution. Don’t over-stretch and don’t compare yourself to anyone else in terms of progress. It’s all about you.

    All the best,
    H&J

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